Wednesday, June 21, 2006

In The Moment

When difficulty comes so powerfully into your life that it cannot be absorbed in your daily routine, but instead radically alters everything you have been used to, it is hard to live in the moment. When you awake day after day to spend long hours unable to do anything more than try to pass the time, it is very hard to keep your mind in the moment. When caring for a loved one has removed you from your normal list of daily responsibilities, it is very hard to stay focused on the here and now. Difficulty tempts you to wrestle with the twin mysteries of the past and the future again and again and again.

Difficulty is a tempter that whispers in our ears, "If you only understood what happened, things would be so much easier." It seems so logical to try to unpack the past and the questions you want answered are the questions any rational person would consider. Yet, for all of the unpacking, you never really get specific answers. There are general conclusions that can be made, but quickly you hit the wall of personal mystery. Looking for these kinds of answers really does anything but lead to rest. Yet, it is so tempting to try to dissect that fatal moment again and again.

Difficulty is a tempter that says, "If only you could see into the future, things would be so much easier." And so it is hard not to try to divine the mysteries of what is to come. It is hard not to pick up the unsettling questions of long-term health, finances, employment, and housing again and again. It is hard not to know what seems so important to know. It is hard to plan when you have little grasp on what is to come.

But difficulty is also a teacher. It calls you to learn that the deepest form of comfort is not found in digging through what you do not know, but in resting in what you do. Difficulty points you away from the seductive lure of secrets, to find hope in things clearly revealed. Difficulty warns you to live in the moment and to see truths previously known now powerfully confirmed, and in so doing, to find hope. The problem is that the tempter is often easier to listen to than the teacher.

Yesterday, in many ways, was a good day. Nicole was able to rest in relative comfort. I was able to be with her and care for her needs. Both things were a blessing not to be missed. But, in the middle of the day, Nicole wrestled with the "what ifs" of the past and the "what could bes" of the future, and as she did, we struggled together to live in the moment. In the cataclysm of all that has happened, it is a daily fight to stay focused on the here and now. Yet, there were graces in yesterday's moment. A card, a poem, a warm meal, and insightful gifts all pointed to God's in-the-moment love. But what you need in the moment is eyes to see and a heart to receive.


Blogger Matt Lollar said...

Hi Mr Tripp,

My name is Matt Lollar, you don't know me but you know Tim Chester, I am Tim's intern in the crowded house. I have been wanting to write you and your wife and Nicole and let you know that me and my fiancee rachel are praying for you all as you go through this hard time. I have been studying Romans 8 recently and it teaches us that there is suffering in this life but neither suffering nor sin nor anything else can seperate us from God's love. And if we just endure suffering and continue to look to God he is going to save us from our suffering. When I have gone through hard things I constantly need to be reminded that God has planned the new creation, and one day we will be there with him in it and "there will be no more death, no more grief or crying or pain." So I pray that Nicole will heal quickly and that in the midst of her pain and suffering she will know the peace of God. And i pray as you and your wife must look on helplessly at the healing process you will be comforted by the fact that our Great Sovereign Lord and Saviour is loving you all perfectly! He is sympathetic and loving, He grieves over the curse of this world and is going to one day give us a new creation! We(me, my fiancee, our church) will continue to pray for you!

Because of His Grace and Love
Matt Lollar

2:53 AM  

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